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sixpence

HISSSSSS

VOL. 20

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2006

Muskrat writing contest!!!

To the joy of everyone, today The Muskrat announced a writing contest, right here! Write an article for us and you could win some moderately great prizes, or some really sucky ones! Go here for details.

 

Water is against my religion

Enter the contest, or this man will jump!

 
 

Archive page updated

Furcadians all across Furcadia rejoiced with unprecedented glee upon learning that The Muskrat's archive page had added new content. That's right! Instead of just archives, the archive page now contains QUESTIONS! and ANSWERS! Answers to the questions, in fact. You know how we do. Here is an example of one of the questions, as well as one of its answers, or rather, its only answer...

What is The Muskrat?

The Muskrat is basically a blatantly plagiarized combination of Randomism and various serious newspapers, like The Onion. Nothing we do is original in any way. Unoriginality is coincidentally the second most important requirement for legitimate journalism (the first requirement is a messianic sense of persistent self-validation despite all harm caused. We have this, too).

Anyway, also added to the archive page: links! If there's Furcadia-related site that you think we should add, you can let us know. Somehow. I hear there's something called electronic mail nowadays. The future is now!

 

Alts for sale

We're selling the following alts. In exchange for one of these alts, write us a 1000 word essay on why you deserve the alt.

 

Mr. Salmon

Coxsackie

Stuttering Mammal

Festering Shred of SpamCannon

Bill Crosby

AntiNoob

The Drain

I always thought there was something odd about that guy....

An example of Beekin's crazy mutterings.

Schizophrenic dragon taken into custody

A homeless, clearly insane dragon who has often been seen standing around Naia Green shouting at random people has been taken into protective custody. Known ironically to some as "Beekin", the dragon has never been considered harmful, but a petition was taken up urging the real Beekins to have him committed to some kind of state-sponsored hospital.

"Yeah, we've seen him around a lot," said Warnvats Wilespy, a regular at Naia Green. "He's really funny. Hee hee hee.

He says the craziest things and it's like he's not even aware of what's going on. One time me and my friends threw eggs at him and he didn't even notice, lol! That's when a Guardian came and told us to 'get out of here, you worthless punks.'"

Psychiatrist Gag Halfrunt, who has been assigned to the "treatment" of Patient #1337, a.k.a. "Beekin", commented that "Vell, Beekin's just zis guy, you know." Felorin, who was standing nearby, was enraged by Halfrunt's comment, and stormed off all in a huff. Felorin is now recovering with a mountain of Belgian chocolate.

 

More Guardianman comics?!

Some little kid that I've never met before named Chibi Edward was so sad that we cancelled Guardianman that he submitted his very own Guardianman comic. We have no idea what's going on

in it. Point and laugh, loyal readers, at the child's primitive artistic abilities! And then, gradually stop laughing... and admire the SOUL in the pictures. Such is the mark of a true artist.

Also, you can see all the Guardianman comics by themselves if you go this way.

Sanctimonious is jealous of Chibi Edward's superior crayon skills.